Rules for Dining at My Table

Hopefully there will be a point in 2021 where we can entertain guests safely in our home again. Here are the rules for dining at my table.

If you don't eat with gusto, the gastric juices are not going to work properly... You just won't digest your food properly. So don't eat meekly!

Julia Child

Between our recent move and generally not being able to see people for COVID safety, something I am particularly looking forward to in 2021 is hosting people over for meals at our new place.


I think one of the terrible things today is that people have this deathly fear of food: fear of eggs, say, or fear of butter. Most doctors feel you can have a little bit of everything.

Julia Child



Other than the new environs, I have further decided that in 2021 I will be instituting rules for dining at my home. There are a couple things that have brought about this decision:

  • It is January, and often in January we hear a lot of talk related to diet changes, diet goals, and health. I find this both tedious and generally toxic. 
  • My mother-in-law gave me a cute little book of quotes by Julia Child for Christmas, People Who Love To Eat Are Always the Best People and Other Wisdom. I was inspired anew by her approach to food, eating, dining, and cooking.

So here are my rules 

1. We won't apologize for eating

I have spoken previously about this being an important paradigm shift for myself, but when I have other people in my home, I will gently remind them it is not necessary under my roof to apologize for eating (if said future guests ever do in fact apologize).

If I have someone over for a meal, the purpose is to eat and visit.

On a more basic-human-needs level, we all need food to survive. We shouldn't ever apologize for something we must do in order to continue living, like breathing.

The pleasures of the table - that lovely old-fashioned phrase - depict food as an art form, as a delightful part of civilized life. In spite of food fads, fitness programs, and health concerns, we must never lose sight of a beautifully conceived meal.

Julia Child

2. We won't police what others are/not eating

If you are dining with other adults, what they do or do not eat in the meal you serve them is their choice. 

As a hostess, you might think it rude to yourself if someone declines something, however, I'm assuming that if you are hosting a meal, you will of course already have taken care to prepare something your guests can/will eat, and you have also explained what you are serving (ex, if there is a certain sauce for a certain dish, if one element of the meal is particularly spicy, etc).

I have been guilty of raising my eyebrows at people who put butter or soy sauce on their rice, or people who season their food with salt or pepper before they have tasted the meal in front of them. Now that I have confessed, I won't be doing that again.


The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook.

Julia Child



Other thoughts on food & diet on the yak occidental

Tips for Adding Vegetarianism into your Diet

20+ statements I have on fatphobia

Read this next:

Cake Is Never Just Cake: The Fraught Politics of Fatness, Desire, and Eating Your Feelings by s.e. smith over at Bitch

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