Things I've Learned So Far in my Thirties

Here are some conclusions that I have come to a couple years into my third decade.

Painting above: Self Portrait (c. 1934) by Georgette Chen

It will be my birthday in a few days! Naturally I'm feeling rather reflective and celebratory. Here is a list of a mix of conclusions I have come to about various things, and few observations about myself. 


  1. Being right has very, very, rarely helped improve any of my relationships. Respecting people's choices has.
  2. I don't stand on ceremony much
  3. It is possible to get along with and even enjoy the company of people who have political and social beliefs that are the polar opposite of my own
  4. As it turns out, I am much more of a redneck than I would ever care to admit. You can take the girl out of the country...
  5. I have inherited a really messed up view of what forgiveness is. These quotes have helped me start to figure out what forgiveness is all about.
  6. Never say never. I don't take a lot of risks and I live a very predictable, routine life and still, somehow, I have come to realize that its best to never say never.
  7. I seem to work best with a messy, chaotic desk, no matter if I'm at work or at home.
  8. Love is always worth it, and for my money, it's the only thing that is always worth it.
  9. Always place your bets on the girls

Sit down with the Greeks and the Romans, and the boring answers get more interesting. Seasons because a girl and a crocus. Death because a girl and an apple. The moon because a girl keeps driving her daft chariot into the sea. 

It's all down to girls, one way or another.

- from Radiance by Catherynne M. Valente 



This post was updated February 2022 to add two points 

This post was updated again in September 2023 to add one point

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